Imagine

i was raised going to the Church of God in SC...they are very much into speaking in tongues, knocking pews over while the holy ghost is in them, laying on of hands to heal, etc.

When i became a teen, i was allowed to skip church if i wanted, so i did.  Completely.  i still believed in god, but hated church.  In HS i joined a group of students the gathered every morning before school to have a prayer session, led by my favorite teacher.

After HS, religion wasn't important...i was beginning to question & wonder, and labeled myself as agnostic but in my day-to-day life it wasn't important.

Then, two missionaries came to the house at the request of my mom's boss (a LDS), and though i thought the stuff they talked about was...out there...i truly enjoyed their company.  So, every Monday (their day off), we'd go picking berries, play games or drive up into the mountains and just hang out.  After the 2nd of those elders was transferred out of my area, i pretty much stopped thinking about any of it.

FF a couple of years and 2 sisters knocked at my door.  i let them in and told them about my past experience with missionaries, and let them know that i had no interest in joining the church but i'd love to hang out with them.  So again, it became a weekly thing and again i loved it.  We'd often meet up with other missionaries in the area.  Very clean, gentle times.

After about 6 months of occasionally going to church, i finally decided to become baptised. i think my main reason was so those 2 sisters could say they'd saved someone before they were transferred.  i didn't say that out loud, of course.  Not long after, i became pregnant and then got married.  By that time the 2 original sisters had moved on, and i wasn't really making any friends in the church, but i loved that everyone was so nice, so welcoming.  i think i was desperate for an emotional support network, and they were it, sort of.

Once i announced i was pregnant, i was told i could no longer take sacrament nor was i allowed to lead prayer during relief society.  Premarital sex was a huge no-no.

Between those disappointments and my failing marriage, i slowly just stopped going.  After my son was born the women were great...they brought a crib and a changing table to me (he wouldn't have had either without those women), and offered their help consistently.  i was and am very grateful for their help during that time.

Over time, i figured out several truths for myself.  One, i was gay.  and 2, i don't believe in god.  The LDS church wouldn't stop pestering me to come back into the fold until one day i'd had enough and sent a letter to the ward bishop letting him know those 2 things.  Not long after, i got the official "you're excommunicated" letter in return.

The idea of a god is a smart one to for those who are believers...be a good person (their definition only) or else you're going to hell!

But it really makes no sense...the "facts" surrounding god are just ridiculous if broken down and examined from a logical, intellectual viewpoint.  It's about as real as santa.

Today, i carry a pretty substantial prejudice towards religion, especially "christians".  i admit i tend to think they're subpar as far as intelligence goes.  Add that to my being born & raised in the redneck, racist south and well.... they are not people i prefer to interact with.